So, for another experiment, I decided I'd been immersed in my new lifestyle for long enough to appreciate the utterly gridlocked culture of the Hamptons from a new perspective. I drove there in a car, which was unusual enough on its own (I haven't been in one since the beginning of August, whereas throughout July and every other month of my life I buckle up almost every single day), but arriving at the no-holds-barred luxury of this immense end of the summer party in Sagaponack was a trip. We parked in a field that was filled with every kind of vehicle imaginable (most of them giant gas guzzlers or fancy sports cars), and walked down a path flanked with tiki torches to a glittering light show inside the party tent, with music blasting from huge elevated speakers and guests floating around drinking cocktails from transparent plastic flutes. The food was classic barbeque, hot dogs, burgers, potato salad and cole slaw, and a salad of cherry tomatoes and mozzarella, and the bars were numerous though not overly extravagant. Plumes of smoke hovered above the crowd as the storm that had seemed so imminent passed benignly overhead, and I was totally seduced by the atmosphere. It took a little while, but eventually the smell of the grill was so enticing that I was consumed with the desire for a burger with mustard and ketchup... It was the first really processed food I'd had since my mom's whole wheat pasta a couple weeks ago, and something in the bun must have triggered it, but I had the weirdest allergic reaction (which I have never had before, by the way), where my lips and eyes swelled up and I broke out in hives on the backs of my elbows and knees... Maybe it was a combination of things... spores of cologne and chemical products and airborne substances just hit me like a brick wall and knocked me down. In the space of about 5 or 6 minutes flat, I went from having a really fun time talking to people I hadn't seen in months on the luminous dance floor to feeling hot and prickly and panicked talking to a paramedic I didn't entirely trust in one of the host's various squeaky white bathrooms.
In any case, the reaction subsided quickly, but I went home anyway and took some benadryl... I don't know if I want to take medicine throughout this month... Definitely not for any small ailment--I got a bee sting yesterday and had no thought of anti-inflammatory drugs--but this was totally unusual and strange and no one in my family felt comfortable enough letting me go to bed without some anti-histamines. Bizarre! I think it must been some kind of combination that overwhelmed my system... Next time around (because I'm getting fairly certain there will be a next time), I want to plant an herb garden or (maybe) some kind of greenhouse to grow some useful or medicinal plants and herbs. Things like aloe for sunburn and citronella for bugs, and then of course the myriads of indigenous flowers and shrubs that were used for a long time before commercial drugs existed that I have yet to explore...
It is a very frustrating process, trying to manage my life in this new way...
Figuring out what parts of my life actually need to be managed and what parts I am over thinking...
Getting my priorities straight so I have time for everything I want to do once I get what I need to do done.
Considering this lifestyle, realizing what is important to me, the reasons I adopted this lifestyle, and then incorporating the things I've loved in life the way I've lived it until now.
Taking advice to heart, and more importantly asking for it!
Reaching out to the resources I have, trusting their guidance before my stagnant deliberation.
Acting in the moment to take full advantage of my time and space and abilities... I want to enrich myself while I'm out here, and I'm almost imposing my own sanctions.
I see what I need to do- like I always do- I just don't know where to begin! I have never been great at jumping into things... That's why I'm good at starting projects, I think. I just need to gather some momentum, and not get caught up in the general pace that exists here, and that is encouraged by long, hot summer days. It would really be great if we had more people working on this with us, because when Karen goes to work, I feel responsible for everything, even when others are willing to help, because then I know I'm the only one who really has all my eggs in this basket. It would have a dramatically different and co-dependent energy and synthesis if everyone who is involved with the project at this point had truly committed themselves at the offset.
In any case... there's no time like the present!
My diet has really been making me feel pretty great, even though my metabolism is strange, and speeds up and slows way down almost day to day. For example, one morning a couple days ago, I had a few glasses of fresh milk for breakfast, and then nothing until eggs for dinner later but a cucumber around midday. Today, on the other hand, I've been eating little bites of quinoa and tomatoes every now and then, I had an egg earlier, and fresh goats milk too... It really does change day to day... But I've had pretty consistently high energy, regardless of how much food I ate on a given day. I always eat when I'm hungry, and I think I'm drinking plenty of water... Food almost comes second to everything else lately. I eat a little here and there, which I am happy doing, but so different from the traditional big summer brunches I'm used to.
I want to go on a nature walk, and get some practice gathering wild edibles! At this point I have some chickory roots to roast, probably tonight, which I can grind into a kind of coffee substitute. We'll have to see about THAT! I am a very picky coffee drinker.
p.s. from Sam- we met at the farmer's market and i lost your contact info the first time you gave it to me. I'm glad to know you're a picky coffee drinker
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